I have been hearing some great quotes from my kids today. Thought I would share a couple. First as I dropped Annie off at her violin lesson, I was walking out as she was taking her violin to the teacher to get it tuned and patting the back of the violin she says, "So do you think we can put some flames on this baby?"
Then we were cleaning up at home and I told Noble to put his puzzle away. He then took it all apart as violently as possible and spread it all over the room. I told him he couldn't help me use the spray bottle with water in it to clean the windows till his puzzle was all picked up. He then said, "But mom, my heart is telling me that my heart just wants to do what my boy heart wants to do."
Two classic quips. Love them.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Through a child's eyes
Sometimes we parents get a rare candid look at how our children see this life we are sharing with them. I have been letting each girl have a night with mom since Jon has been out of town. They sleep with me and get to stay up an extra half hour with me.
Tonight is Annie's night. I needed to clean downstairs and she wanted to write on her blog so that is how we spent our half hour up late together. At the end of out time she let me read what she wrote. It melted my tired bones. Read it HERE.
I have high hopes for her post tomorrow because when Annie sets her mind to doing something she usually does it 150%.
Tonight is Annie's night. I needed to clean downstairs and she wanted to write on her blog so that is how we spent our half hour up late together. At the end of out time she let me read what she wrote. It melted my tired bones. Read it HERE.
I have high hopes for her post tomorrow because when Annie sets her mind to doing something she usually does it 150%.
Bone Tired
I am skipping my morning workout. I have been going to the gym every morning for a couple of weeks as a way to let the kids play and maybe get some exercise myself. But Harrison just cries the whole time and then after 30 minutes they page me to come get him. And yesterday I had such a busy day that by 8:30 I was in bed to tired to go on. :) So I am giving myself a day off from my workout.
I have discovered that having a new middle schooler is for me about as much work as having a toddler. We are having to check homework and study (which means I have to relearn math and english and science) and work on extra curricular activities. I feel I have to help be the organizational training wheels to help Sabrina learn to juggle all her classes and her extra curricular things.
It is hard to help her when I have little ones demanding my attention. So this morning instead of getting up to exercise, we got up and studied together. I figure she can work out while the kids are demanding my attention. I guess we will try this out and see how it works studying in the morning.
It isn't easy being the guinea pig kid where your mom is having to learn the best way to do things. But then you do get all new clothes. :)
I am ready for my hubby to come home. Now I have to go sweep my floors and take out my trash (those things Jon normally does.) Is it Friday yet?
I have discovered that having a new middle schooler is for me about as much work as having a toddler. We are having to check homework and study (which means I have to relearn math and english and science) and work on extra curricular activities. I feel I have to help be the organizational training wheels to help Sabrina learn to juggle all her classes and her extra curricular things.
It is hard to help her when I have little ones demanding my attention. So this morning instead of getting up to exercise, we got up and studied together. I figure she can work out while the kids are demanding my attention. I guess we will try this out and see how it works studying in the morning.
It isn't easy being the guinea pig kid where your mom is having to learn the best way to do things. But then you do get all new clothes. :)
I am ready for my hubby to come home. Now I have to go sweep my floors and take out my trash (those things Jon normally does.) Is it Friday yet?
Monday, September 24, 2012
Gathering courage
Jon is out of town all week. So some how I am trying to gather my strength and courage to go it alone. Really it shouldn't be a big deal. I mean I do most of the work of running our home on my own everyday. He doesn't usually get home till the kids are in bed or getting in bed. It shouldn't be that different.
But somehow coming off a weekend away with him I feel his absence more keenly. I am grateful everyday for the support he is to me and for how wonderful he is as a dad.
Looking forward to Friday already.
But somehow coming off a weekend away with him I feel his absence more keenly. I am grateful everyday for the support he is to me and for how wonderful he is as a dad.
Looking forward to Friday already.
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Lingering Grief - Lasting Support
Sometimes waves of grief come unexpectedly even years down the road. I have been feeling my loss weigh on my heart more than normal lately. It hasn't felt like the crashing waves of fresh grief. It is more of a huge swell in the tide ... gentler but just as deeply felt.
The nice thing about fresh grief is that it is expected ... by everyone. People expect you are hurting. They don't need to be told. They treat you gently. There is no or at least little embarrassment in fresh grief. It is more ... understood.
Lingering grief on the other hand is more of a mystery both to those who feel it and the outside world looking at it. There is no telling when it will hit and how long it will last or why it has come again. It is unpredictable and there is much more of a stigma felt in grieving over a loss years later.
So we lingering grievers don't always open up and admit when we are hurting. Sometimes we are quieter than we used to be or maybe more withdrawn. We don't want to pull others around us back into our grief with us. We bare it more on our own and remember the kindnesses of the past to remind us of the love and support we felt and let the memory of that support shore us up now.
Then last week, out of the blue, I got an email from a couple of readers of this blog. Brooke and Annette from I Declare Charms wrote to tell me they had made a necklace for me. They did it as a thank you for this blog and what they feel they have gotten from my posts. They asked for my address to mail it to me.
I really can't put into words how humbled and grateful I am to receive such a gift. It tells me that even now 4 years and 3 months later people still care and remember and understand. It shows me that the Lord remembers me and my heart ache and is still taking care of me even years down this road.
The necklace is beautiful. I absolutely love it. I love that Camille's charm is a little different from my other children's. I love that Ann Marie's charm has AM on it. And I most of all love the feeling I get of support and strength from people I have never met when I wear it. Thank you so much Brooke and Annette and all the team at I Declare Charms.
Last night I wore my new necklace on my date with my husband to see Wicked for the first time. I sat in my chair enjoying the performance through the first half. At intermission, I was thinking to myself about how I have changed since Camille's death. My in laws were at the performance and I notice that I act more withdrawn and distant than I used to sometimes. I don't mean to. I don't love any less. I just ... am changed.
So then we started into the second half. I felt the challenge to defy the emotional gravity I have been feeling and lift myself up and out into the world. And then the two leads began the song "For Good."
I sat with tears streaming down my face thinking of my little girl and how she has changed me for good. I can only hope that the ways I have been changed for the better outweigh the ways I have been changed for the worse. This much I know for sure, I have been changed for good.
The live music and performance affected me. I felt it deeply and could hardly talk after the show. I still feel remnants of it now. I could barely tell Jon why I was so quiet as we drove home. At home I listened to the music once more on my phone and then I got ready for bed. I kept my necklace on. I just wasn't ready to take it off yet. Then I snuggled up under my "magic blanket" that my friend LaRae gave us after Camille died. It feels like a hug and reminds me of the love and support I have from both sides of the veil. And I felt loved and supported regardless of how I have been changed. And I slept.
The nice thing about fresh grief is that it is expected ... by everyone. People expect you are hurting. They don't need to be told. They treat you gently. There is no or at least little embarrassment in fresh grief. It is more ... understood.
Lingering grief on the other hand is more of a mystery both to those who feel it and the outside world looking at it. There is no telling when it will hit and how long it will last or why it has come again. It is unpredictable and there is much more of a stigma felt in grieving over a loss years later.
So we lingering grievers don't always open up and admit when we are hurting. Sometimes we are quieter than we used to be or maybe more withdrawn. We don't want to pull others around us back into our grief with us. We bare it more on our own and remember the kindnesses of the past to remind us of the love and support we felt and let the memory of that support shore us up now.
Then last week, out of the blue, I got an email from a couple of readers of this blog. Brooke and Annette from I Declare Charms wrote to tell me they had made a necklace for me. They did it as a thank you for this blog and what they feel they have gotten from my posts. They asked for my address to mail it to me.
I really can't put into words how humbled and grateful I am to receive such a gift. It tells me that even now 4 years and 3 months later people still care and remember and understand. It shows me that the Lord remembers me and my heart ache and is still taking care of me even years down this road.
The necklace is beautiful. I absolutely love it. I love that Camille's charm is a little different from my other children's. I love that Ann Marie's charm has AM on it. And I most of all love the feeling I get of support and strength from people I have never met when I wear it. Thank you so much Brooke and Annette and all the team at I Declare Charms.
Last night I wore my new necklace on my date with my husband to see Wicked for the first time. I sat in my chair enjoying the performance through the first half. At intermission, I was thinking to myself about how I have changed since Camille's death. My in laws were at the performance and I notice that I act more withdrawn and distant than I used to sometimes. I don't mean to. I don't love any less. I just ... am changed.
So then we started into the second half. I felt the challenge to defy the emotional gravity I have been feeling and lift myself up and out into the world. And then the two leads began the song "For Good."
I sat with tears streaming down my face thinking of my little girl and how she has changed me for good. I can only hope that the ways I have been changed for the better outweigh the ways I have been changed for the worse. This much I know for sure, I have been changed for good.
The live music and performance affected me. I felt it deeply and could hardly talk after the show. I still feel remnants of it now. I could barely tell Jon why I was so quiet as we drove home. At home I listened to the music once more on my phone and then I got ready for bed. I kept my necklace on. I just wasn't ready to take it off yet. Then I snuggled up under my "magic blanket" that my friend LaRae gave us after Camille died. It feels like a hug and reminds me of the love and support I have from both sides of the veil. And I felt loved and supported regardless of how I have been changed. And I slept.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Portland
I am just getting back into the swing of my daily routine after getting back from our trip to Portland. We had a great time and got to relax and enjoy being a couple again. I was reminded once again about what a gentleman my husband can be. Chivalry is not dead people. I loved that about him when we met and I love it now too. I love that he always opens doors for me and walks on the street side of the sidewalk.
We had a great time sleeping till we woke up on our own and working out together and deciding what we wanted to do each day. We ate loads of good food. (I gained 5 lbs. in 4 days and it was totally worth it.) Veritable Quandary was the highlight of the food for me. Best bacon wrapped dates I have ever had there. Jon enjoyed his pork cheeks at the Heathman best.
Cannon beach is one of the best beaches I have ever been to. I loved how find and soft the sand was and how the tide went out and left lots of little tide pools to explore. I would totally want to take kids there someday. I will have great memories from that trip.
Now I am trying to catch up on laundry and running my home. Kids are a lot of work. :0) But some moments make it all worth it. Like when Noble asked me if Harrison had blond hair like he does and when I said he did Noble asked me, "Mom, why did you paint his hair blond?" Or sitting with my two boys on my lap snuggled up watching a little television today. I just love those calm moments with the weight of their little bodies all snuggled up to me.
Now is not one of those calm moments. I hear them upstairs through our intercom system playing in the nursery and dancing like crazy boys to the classical music on Harrison's sound machine. In small doses, I like those crazy moments too that remind me they are kids and these are boys with all the energy and vigor that little boys can muster. Vacations are good but I wouldn't trade the felicity and craziness of my domestic life for anything.
We had a great time sleeping till we woke up on our own and working out together and deciding what we wanted to do each day. We ate loads of good food. (I gained 5 lbs. in 4 days and it was totally worth it.) Veritable Quandary was the highlight of the food for me. Best bacon wrapped dates I have ever had there. Jon enjoyed his pork cheeks at the Heathman best.
Cannon beach is one of the best beaches I have ever been to. I loved how find and soft the sand was and how the tide went out and left lots of little tide pools to explore. I would totally want to take kids there someday. I will have great memories from that trip.
Now I am trying to catch up on laundry and running my home. Kids are a lot of work. :0) But some moments make it all worth it. Like when Noble asked me if Harrison had blond hair like he does and when I said he did Noble asked me, "Mom, why did you paint his hair blond?" Or sitting with my two boys on my lap snuggled up watching a little television today. I just love those calm moments with the weight of their little bodies all snuggled up to me.
Now is not one of those calm moments. I hear them upstairs through our intercom system playing in the nursery and dancing like crazy boys to the classical music on Harrison's sound machine. In small doses, I like those crazy moments too that remind me they are kids and these are boys with all the energy and vigor that little boys can muster. Vacations are good but I wouldn't trade the felicity and craziness of my domestic life for anything.
Monday, September 10, 2012
Normal
Thanks for all the book recommendations. I just finished the Mysterious Education of Nicholas Benedict (a prequel to the Mysterious Benedict Society books) and loved it.
Jon and I leave for an alone trip to Portland on Wednesday and I am excited. It has been a long time since we had a real vacation (one where we didn't have to take care of children.) My wonderful mother in law is coming to take care of my children. So this will be a busy few days doing our weekly routine and getting things ready to leave town.
Sometimes I feel our lives are so "normal" that there is nothing to blog about these days. But then someday, our normal will change and I will forget what this normal is like. So today I want to blog about what our normal life is like right now. Welcome to a day in the life of the Waite family:
5:30 am - We wake up either to Sabrina's alarm or Noble coming in to climb in bed with me. Sabrina puts on her tennis shoes and gets on the treadmill for a 20 min. walk followed by her shower. This helps wake her up in the morning (otherwise a monumental task) and keeps her active since she doesn't have PE or any other extracurricular sport.
6:30 am - I get up and get dressed and go down to make sure kids are doing their morning chores of emptying the dishwasher and eating their breakfasts and practicing their music.
6:45 ish - We read scriptures together and have morning prayers. Kids finish up their morning duties.
7:20 am - Sabrina and I go pick up 3 other kids and head to the middle school for carpool drop off.
8:00 am - the other girls are usually done with their lists by now and they play on the computer for a bit if they are.
8:20 am - Carpool comes to pick up Lauren and Annie
8:30 am - The boys and I have the day to spend as we choose. Sometimes I will try taking them to they gym so I can workout and they can play. But Harrison isn't too fond of the playroom without mom there yet. Once a week Noble has a swim lesson. Many days we play toys or read or watch some Octonaunts on TV. Some days we go grocery shopping or errand running. Once in a while we go play with friends.
Noon - Boys nap. I cook or clean or blog or sleep or read.
2:30 Sabrina gets dropped off by the carpool and the boys wake up. We get some time together before the other kids get home. We talk and she practices her piano.
3:30 Annie and Lauren are dropped off by the carpool. After snacks we either dive into homework or I get cooking for dinner club or we go to piano lessons or strings lessons or dance class depending on the day. Annie and Lauren are both in dance this year and all of them are in piano and Sabrina and Annie are in viola and violin respectively.
7:00 All homework and after school activities and dinner are done, usually the girls have had some free time in there as well to spend as they choose. We say family prayers and put the boys to bed. The girls do one household chore of my choosing (usually cleaning up the kitchen and family room), I do the dishes and help them make lunches for the next day. They get ready for bed. Annie and Lauren take their shower.
8:00 The girls get in bed and read.
8:30 Lights out and kisses goodnight.
8:35 Threats from mom if there is any more talking. :)
8:45 silence and sleeping kids, mom reads and dad, who usually has just recently gotten home, eats dinner and watches tv or reads.
10 pm mom's bed time.
They are full days but good days and I am treasuring them.
Jon and I leave for an alone trip to Portland on Wednesday and I am excited. It has been a long time since we had a real vacation (one where we didn't have to take care of children.) My wonderful mother in law is coming to take care of my children. So this will be a busy few days doing our weekly routine and getting things ready to leave town.
Sometimes I feel our lives are so "normal" that there is nothing to blog about these days. But then someday, our normal will change and I will forget what this normal is like. So today I want to blog about what our normal life is like right now. Welcome to a day in the life of the Waite family:
5:30 am - We wake up either to Sabrina's alarm or Noble coming in to climb in bed with me. Sabrina puts on her tennis shoes and gets on the treadmill for a 20 min. walk followed by her shower. This helps wake her up in the morning (otherwise a monumental task) and keeps her active since she doesn't have PE or any other extracurricular sport.
6:30 am - I get up and get dressed and go down to make sure kids are doing their morning chores of emptying the dishwasher and eating their breakfasts and practicing their music.
6:45 ish - We read scriptures together and have morning prayers. Kids finish up their morning duties.
7:20 am - Sabrina and I go pick up 3 other kids and head to the middle school for carpool drop off.
8:00 am - the other girls are usually done with their lists by now and they play on the computer for a bit if they are.
8:20 am - Carpool comes to pick up Lauren and Annie
8:30 am - The boys and I have the day to spend as we choose. Sometimes I will try taking them to they gym so I can workout and they can play. But Harrison isn't too fond of the playroom without mom there yet. Once a week Noble has a swim lesson. Many days we play toys or read or watch some Octonaunts on TV. Some days we go grocery shopping or errand running. Once in a while we go play with friends.
Noon - Boys nap. I cook or clean or blog or sleep or read.
2:30 Sabrina gets dropped off by the carpool and the boys wake up. We get some time together before the other kids get home. We talk and she practices her piano.
3:30 Annie and Lauren are dropped off by the carpool. After snacks we either dive into homework or I get cooking for dinner club or we go to piano lessons or strings lessons or dance class depending on the day. Annie and Lauren are both in dance this year and all of them are in piano and Sabrina and Annie are in viola and violin respectively.
7:00 All homework and after school activities and dinner are done, usually the girls have had some free time in there as well to spend as they choose. We say family prayers and put the boys to bed. The girls do one household chore of my choosing (usually cleaning up the kitchen and family room), I do the dishes and help them make lunches for the next day. They get ready for bed. Annie and Lauren take their shower.
8:00 The girls get in bed and read.
8:30 Lights out and kisses goodnight.
8:35 Threats from mom if there is any more talking. :)
8:45 silence and sleeping kids, mom reads and dad, who usually has just recently gotten home, eats dinner and watches tv or reads.
10 pm mom's bed time.
They are full days but good days and I am treasuring them.
Monday, September 3, 2012
Books for Kids
I have some pretty avid readers in my home. Consequently I am always on the lookout for new books that are good for them to read. So I thought I would share some of what we have read on here with all of you and ask you to share any other books you would recommend. I'll sort the books by level.
Easy Chapter Books:
My kids have love the following series:
A-Z Mysteries
Magic Tree House
Magic School Bus
Cam Jensen Books
Some of the Junie B. Jones (I don't like the attitude of some of them.)
Pretty much anything by Roald Dahl - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, BFG, James and the Giant Peach etc...
Nacy Drew books by Keene and pamintuan
Little Apple Fairy Books
American Girl Books
A little Harder:
Beverly Cleary's Ramona books and Ralph S. Mouse books
Judy Blumes Superfudge books and Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing
All the Junior Classics for Young Readers
Socks
The Boxcar Children Series
Other harder Chapter Books We have loved:
Walk Two Moons
Because of Winn Dixie
Julie of the Wolves
Daddy Longlegs
The Learnin Dog
Tuck Everlasting
The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane
Holes
Rules
Warriors
Finally
My Side of the Mountain (one of Sabrina's favorites)
The Penderwicks
Number the Stars
Gathering Blue
Rebel Hart
Percy Jackson
Kane Chronicles series
Harry Potter Series
Chronicles of Narnia
Bridge to Terabithia
Moon over Manifest
Fablehaven
School of Fear
The Doll People
Great Brain books
Secret Garden
Anne of Green Gables
Magyk
Suddenly Supernatural
Mysterious Benedict Society
Mother Daughter Book Club Series
Frindle
Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of Nimh
A Wrinkle in Time
Hoot
Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites
My Sister the Vampire
Books for middle school: This is where I am REALLY needing help. I need books appropriate for my 11 year old that are on a 7-8 grade reading level. Most of the books below are not really that reading level but are for more mature readers. Sabrina isn't quiet to the level of Jane Austin or many other classics.
MazeRunner series
Hunger Games
Mistborn
On our To Read List:
Betsy Tacy Books (4th grade level)
Little Women (I love this and I need to see if Sabrina can tackle it yet.)
The Lord of the Rings
The Hobbit
Okay readers. Give me some of your best suggestions for chapter books for kids (especially that middle school age!) Hope you find a book or two on here your kids haven't read yet that they might enjoy.
Easy Chapter Books:
My kids have love the following series:
A-Z Mysteries
Magic Tree House
Magic School Bus
Cam Jensen Books
Some of the Junie B. Jones (I don't like the attitude of some of them.)
Pretty much anything by Roald Dahl - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, BFG, James and the Giant Peach etc...
Nacy Drew books by Keene and pamintuan
Little Apple Fairy Books
American Girl Books
A little Harder:
Beverly Cleary's Ramona books and Ralph S. Mouse books
Judy Blumes Superfudge books and Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing
All the Junior Classics for Young Readers
Socks
The Boxcar Children Series
Other harder Chapter Books We have loved:
Walk Two Moons
Because of Winn Dixie
Julie of the Wolves
Daddy Longlegs
The Learnin Dog
Tuck Everlasting
The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane
Holes
Rules
Warriors
Finally
My Side of the Mountain (one of Sabrina's favorites)
The Penderwicks
Number the Stars
Gathering Blue
Rebel Hart
Percy Jackson
Kane Chronicles series
Harry Potter Series
Chronicles of Narnia
Bridge to Terabithia
Moon over Manifest
Fablehaven
School of Fear
The Doll People
Great Brain books
Secret Garden
Anne of Green Gables
Magyk
Suddenly Supernatural
Mysterious Benedict Society
Mother Daughter Book Club Series
Frindle
Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of Nimh
A Wrinkle in Time
Hoot
Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites
My Sister the Vampire
Books for middle school: This is where I am REALLY needing help. I need books appropriate for my 11 year old that are on a 7-8 grade reading level. Most of the books below are not really that reading level but are for more mature readers. Sabrina isn't quiet to the level of Jane Austin or many other classics.
MazeRunner series
Hunger Games
Mistborn
On our To Read List:
Betsy Tacy Books (4th grade level)
Little Women (I love this and I need to see if Sabrina can tackle it yet.)
The Lord of the Rings
The Hobbit
Okay readers. Give me some of your best suggestions for chapter books for kids (especially that middle school age!) Hope you find a book or two on here your kids haven't read yet that they might enjoy.
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Look who Annie met at dance
Annie got in the car after her hip hop class tonight and told me they got to do solo free styles (her favorite thing to do) AND that Mr. Dar (Darian from So You Think You Can Dance) was there and taught them some moves.
What??? So I gave her my phone and told her to go get a photo with him. She comes back and reports that she went in and said, cool as a cucumber, to him "so my mom is like this big fan of you know ..." he says the name of the show. "Yeah that. So she told me to come get a photo with you."
Thanks for obliging Darian!
What??? So I gave her my phone and told her to go get a photo with him. She comes back and reports that she went in and said, cool as a cucumber, to him "so my mom is like this big fan of you know ..." he says the name of the show. "Yeah that. So she told me to come get a photo with you."
Thanks for obliging Darian!
Monday, August 27, 2012
Fresh Starts
It is our first day of school again. Today I am feeling grateful for fresh starts. I feel the first day of school is a "fresh start" day for me as well as my kids. It is like New Years Day and the first day of summer vacation that way.
Today I had fresh new routines listed out for the girls which went so smoothly this morning. Then after getting them off to school I went over and joined the gym for my own fresh start.
I feel a bit more organized than usual and my body is feeling awake and alive from my workout. It is a great fresh start for the school year.
Today I had fresh new routines listed out for the girls which went so smoothly this morning. Then after getting them off to school I went over and joined the gym for my own fresh start.
I feel a bit more organized than usual and my body is feeling awake and alive from my workout. It is a great fresh start for the school year.
Friday, August 24, 2012
Changes
Changes have been taking place around the Waite home lately. We are about to embark on the new adventure of having a child in middle school. This has brought some pretty significant changes to our home for me, and for the kids.
Personally, I have found this transition to be going far more smoothly than I could have imagined. I put together a week long, 3 hour per day, day camp for 17 girls all starting middle school together from 4 different elementary schools last week. I had 3 moms be in charge of each day and it gave the girls a chance to get to make new friends and get to know a few people better before that socially intimidating first day of school. Plus they had fun. :0)
We did get to know you games and team building exercises the first day. The second and fourth days they swam. The third day they went roller skating. The last day they made matching necklaces and did other crafty things together. Then a few of the moms and daughters went over to Bread and Butter for a cooking class for the girls. Chef Chris was so great!
Personally, I have found this transition to be going far more smoothly than I could have imagined. I put together a week long, 3 hour per day, day camp for 17 girls all starting middle school together from 4 different elementary schools last week. I had 3 moms be in charge of each day and it gave the girls a chance to get to make new friends and get to know a few people better before that socially intimidating first day of school. Plus they had fun. :0)
We did get to know you games and team building exercises the first day. The second and fourth days they swam. The third day they went roller skating. The last day they made matching necklaces and did other crafty things together. Then a few of the moms and daughters went over to Bread and Butter for a cooking class for the girls. Chef Chris was so great!
I feel very good about Sabrina's schedule and her teachers. She has friends in every class and some friends in 3 or 4 classes. She also has been doing more babysitting at home. I have trained her all summer and she can now change diapers (both wet and stinky), bathe and get boys dressed, put boys to bed, make a few simple meals and handle the boys for limited amounts of time. It has been HUGE to be able to leave her babysitting so I can run errands without little boys.
In light of these new responsibilities, the fact that she will have textbooks at home that need to be out of the reach of little boys' hands, and the fact that she will be waking up an hour earlier than the other kids, we felt it was time for Sabrina to get her own space in our home. So last weekend we dismantled the playroom and created a bedroom specifically for Sabrina.
Here are some photos she took of it. Note that we haven't decorated. I figure a room makeover budget might be a great birthday present. :)
She is thrilled with the new space and has been working to keep it clean.
As I drove to the elementary school open house today I noted that we will never have 3 kids at a school again. This year Camille would have started Kindergarten. In her absence there will never be 3 Waites at that school again. By the time Noble starts Annie will be in 6th grade. I had a plan for everyone to have a buddy 2 years ahead of them in school. But life happens and changes happen-some good some bad. And so we play the hand we are dealt and make the new plan beautiful.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
For Collin
I just walked into the house after a 16 hour trip to California. We left this morning at 4 a.m. to drive to our old neighborhood in Long Beach. We had a funeral to attend. A bit of back story is in order I think.
About 6 months after Jon and I were married, we moved to Long Beach. We were one of two very newly married couples in our new church congregation there. The other couple was Jason and Julie Presley. We both got pregnant around the same time. 10 weeks into my pregnancy I miscarried. Julie carried her baby to about 32 weeks (if I remember correctly) and then delivered a little 3 lb. boy that they named Collin Matthew.
Collin had many problems from his first days of life. After years of testing and searching, he was diagnosed with TTD, a rare disease that fewer than 100 people in the world have. It causes many issues including skin sensitivity to light, pain, seizures, deafness, blindness, premature aging, and many more.
Last month Collin celebrated his 12 birthday. For a child who doctors said wasn't supposed to even see his first birthday, Collin was a living miracle. Last Thursday, Collin died unexpectedly in his sleep.
And so Jon and I, knowing how much it meant to us that people came to Camille's funeral, determined to make the drive down to Collin's funeral.
We arrived just shortly before the end of the viewing prior to the funeral. So I went in to give Julie and Jason a hug. It has been a long time since I have been to a child's funeral. And it has been a long time since I have been in the physical presence of another mother so fresh in the raw grief of losing her child.
As soon as I hugged Julie, her strongholds fell. I held her, told her I loved her and that I knew. And I told her that she could do this. As we hugged, to me it felt as if there were a matching part of our hearts. Julie and I have known each other all these 13 years but we have never been really close. But there is a connection between mothers who have lost children that runs deeper than one can imagine.
We know the deepest, most tender, most precious part of each others hearts. We are connected. And I felt that in a real way today.
Being at the funeral brought back so many memories for me. Collin's grandfather gave a wonderful eulogy that aptly portrayed Collin's true self as he lived on this earth. There were tears and laughter involved.
As he was giving the eulogy, I had an impression. It was an impression of Collins presence as he is now. We are often told that those with special challenges and handicaps here on earth are spirits that are exceptional in their lives before this world. Today, as I felt this impression of Collin I felt just how exceptional they are. There was incredible majesty in his presence. I think if we could see Collin today as he is in heaven we would be amazed at his glory and at just how very like the Savior he is.
It has been a long day. We went to the beach for a little while after the funeral and then headed home. Julie and Jason are no doubt overwhelmed by this new chapter of grief into which their lives have entered. I remember being there. I remember how hard it was to have mothering be so easy without my baby. She was most of my work. Julie is no doubt facing that now. She has been nurse, mother, advocate, and so much more for Collin and his little sister Regan all these years. Now there are no more doctor appointments or procedures or middle of the night wakings or pill schedules or diapers or feedings. So much easier can sometimes feel so much harder.
But Julie and Jason are strong and they will make their way through this chapter of grief. One way or another we all are forced to find our way through it. I hope they will be gentle with themselves and each other as they do. And one day I hope they will come to a more hopeful and happy chapter as I feel we have.
Until then, I pray that they who have carried and cared so faithfully for little Collin all these years will now be able to feel his now mighty arms carrying and caring for them.
About 6 months after Jon and I were married, we moved to Long Beach. We were one of two very newly married couples in our new church congregation there. The other couple was Jason and Julie Presley. We both got pregnant around the same time. 10 weeks into my pregnancy I miscarried. Julie carried her baby to about 32 weeks (if I remember correctly) and then delivered a little 3 lb. boy that they named Collin Matthew.
Collin had many problems from his first days of life. After years of testing and searching, he was diagnosed with TTD, a rare disease that fewer than 100 people in the world have. It causes many issues including skin sensitivity to light, pain, seizures, deafness, blindness, premature aging, and many more.
Last month Collin celebrated his 12 birthday. For a child who doctors said wasn't supposed to even see his first birthday, Collin was a living miracle. Last Thursday, Collin died unexpectedly in his sleep.
And so Jon and I, knowing how much it meant to us that people came to Camille's funeral, determined to make the drive down to Collin's funeral.
We arrived just shortly before the end of the viewing prior to the funeral. So I went in to give Julie and Jason a hug. It has been a long time since I have been to a child's funeral. And it has been a long time since I have been in the physical presence of another mother so fresh in the raw grief of losing her child.
As soon as I hugged Julie, her strongholds fell. I held her, told her I loved her and that I knew. And I told her that she could do this. As we hugged, to me it felt as if there were a matching part of our hearts. Julie and I have known each other all these 13 years but we have never been really close. But there is a connection between mothers who have lost children that runs deeper than one can imagine.
We know the deepest, most tender, most precious part of each others hearts. We are connected. And I felt that in a real way today.
Being at the funeral brought back so many memories for me. Collin's grandfather gave a wonderful eulogy that aptly portrayed Collin's true self as he lived on this earth. There were tears and laughter involved.
As he was giving the eulogy, I had an impression. It was an impression of Collins presence as he is now. We are often told that those with special challenges and handicaps here on earth are spirits that are exceptional in their lives before this world. Today, as I felt this impression of Collin I felt just how exceptional they are. There was incredible majesty in his presence. I think if we could see Collin today as he is in heaven we would be amazed at his glory and at just how very like the Savior he is.
It has been a long day. We went to the beach for a little while after the funeral and then headed home. Julie and Jason are no doubt overwhelmed by this new chapter of grief into which their lives have entered. I remember being there. I remember how hard it was to have mothering be so easy without my baby. She was most of my work. Julie is no doubt facing that now. She has been nurse, mother, advocate, and so much more for Collin and his little sister Regan all these years. Now there are no more doctor appointments or procedures or middle of the night wakings or pill schedules or diapers or feedings. So much easier can sometimes feel so much harder.
But Julie and Jason are strong and they will make their way through this chapter of grief. One way or another we all are forced to find our way through it. I hope they will be gentle with themselves and each other as they do. And one day I hope they will come to a more hopeful and happy chapter as I feel we have.
Until then, I pray that they who have carried and cared so faithfully for little Collin all these years will now be able to feel his now mighty arms carrying and caring for them.
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Portland Tips
Jon and I are planning a short get away to Portland next month. We are hoping a few days away will remind us we are Jonathan and Stephanie not just Dad and Mom. :) I thought I would reach out to my favorite people for some tips on where to go, what to do, where to stay, etc.
We are thinking that if we stay in downtown Portland we won't have to rent a car for more than maybe a day to go see the natural beauty. What do you think? I hear public transportation is pretty good there.
You know I love good food. Anybody got some MUST EATS from the Portland area?
Give me the good info people. :)
We are thinking that if we stay in downtown Portland we won't have to rent a car for more than maybe a day to go see the natural beauty. What do you think? I hear public transportation is pretty good there.
You know I love good food. Anybody got some MUST EATS from the Portland area?
Give me the good info people. :)
Monday, August 6, 2012
Storms
2008 was a stormy year. Camille died that summer and my soul raged with uncontrollable emotions. It seemed Nature mourned with me as great summer storms and crazy winter weather displayed their fury. There were an uncanny number of storms that year. I noticed them. I appreciated them. They seemed to mirror my emotions. I even took some photos of them.
They always start with a lovely cloudy sky. Then after a while, the downpour would begin.
The wind would howl and we could feel the raw power of Mother Natures. That winter it even snowed here. That doesn't happen very often and it had been about 25 years since it had happened before.
I remember one Sunday driving home from church with cloudy skies and as we drove up the mountain to our home it was as if there was a storm cloud sitting only on our little community. We drove home into the storm. I thought it very fitting.
I have noticed each each since 2008 there seem to be fewer or less violent storms. I mean we have a good one now and then. But in 2008 these monster storms were frequent. It seems like it has been months and months since we have had a good downpour here. We have been threatened with rain several times these last few weeks but only a little rain burst has shown up now and then. Light rain for 5 minutes and then it is gone.
I feel the desire for a great downpour. It is cloudy today. But there is only a 20% chance of rain. Seems there will be no storm today. I am grateful the Lord sent His storms so powerfully in 2008. I hope sometime soon he will favor us with another.
They always start with a lovely cloudy sky. Then after a while, the downpour would begin.
The wind would howl and we could feel the raw power of Mother Natures. That winter it even snowed here. That doesn't happen very often and it had been about 25 years since it had happened before.
I remember one Sunday driving home from church with cloudy skies and as we drove up the mountain to our home it was as if there was a storm cloud sitting only on our little community. We drove home into the storm. I thought it very fitting.
I have noticed each each since 2008 there seem to be fewer or less violent storms. I mean we have a good one now and then. But in 2008 these monster storms were frequent. It seems like it has been months and months since we have had a good downpour here. We have been threatened with rain several times these last few weeks but only a little rain burst has shown up now and then. Light rain for 5 minutes and then it is gone.
I feel the desire for a great downpour. It is cloudy today. But there is only a 20% chance of rain. Seems there will be no storm today. I am grateful the Lord sent His storms so powerfully in 2008. I hope sometime soon he will favor us with another.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Turkey lollipops
I saw a food network show the other day featuring some turkey meatballs that looked delicious. Today I made them for dinner. They were even better than I had imagined and everyone in my family liked them! Noble ate 4 without any prompting!
I found the recipe at http://m.foodnetwork.com/recipes/recipe/645448
I did substitute a few things for ingredients I didn't have on hand. I used green onions and some onion powder instead of a white onion. I used fresh oregano instead of parsley. And I used regular bread crumbs instead of Panko. Also I omitted the cayenne pepper from the glaze so it wouldn't be too spicy for the kids.
These were so easy and yummy. I think I will make them for my dinner club sometime soon.
I found the recipe at http://m.foodnetwork.com/recipes/recipe/645448
I did substitute a few things for ingredients I didn't have on hand. I used green onions and some onion powder instead of a white onion. I used fresh oregano instead of parsley. And I used regular bread crumbs instead of Panko. Also I omitted the cayenne pepper from the glaze so it wouldn't be too spicy for the kids.
These were so easy and yummy. I think I will make them for my dinner club sometime soon.
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Keeping the Flame Burning
We did our best to fit all the tips we gathered on how to keep the flame burning in a marriage into the 5 minutes we were given. We ran over but I feel like we gave good tips. Thanks to everyone for your help in the comments.
It all boiled down to finding ways to stay connected to your spouse as a person not just as "mom" and "dad." We pointed out that the best thing you can do for your kids is to love your spouse (their other parent.)
The flame of marital love does wax and wan at different seasons of our life. When you are in the baby stage (pregnant or nursing) perhaps the physical connection may burn less brightly. The key is to stay connected in other ways during these times so you can keep your marital flame alive.
We broke down ways to connect in 3 categories: Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual.
Here are our notes about ways we can connect in those areas.
I hope you will find some of these tips helpful to you. I know I got a few good ones out of our assignment. Now I am going to go reconnect with my hubby. :)
It all boiled down to finding ways to stay connected to your spouse as a person not just as "mom" and "dad." We pointed out that the best thing you can do for your kids is to love your spouse (their other parent.)
The flame of marital love does wax and wan at different seasons of our life. When you are in the baby stage (pregnant or nursing) perhaps the physical connection may burn less brightly. The key is to stay connected in other ways during these times so you can keep your marital flame alive.
We broke down ways to connect in 3 categories: Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual.
Here are our notes about ways we can connect in those areas.
Physical
· Take Trips Together
·
Or ship the kids off to do a staycation as a
couple (plan some spice)
·
Touch your husband/wife. Hold hands. Scratch backs.
·
Women: say yes as much as you can. Make physical intimacy a priority. If you can schedule time during the
day, do it because most of us are tired at the end of the night and do not give
it the proper attention.
·
Be affectionate in front of the kids
·
Couple’s beds off limits to kids during night hours
Emotional
· Make a list of Random Questions to find out new things about your spouse and use as conversation starters.
·
Do something purposeful for the other person (leave a note, do a chore you don't normally do, give a compliment, buy flowers, give a massage)
·
Date Night-- DO IT: not just movie – something with
interaction
·
PLAN a date in advance
·
Read a book together
·
Instagram photos of things that make you smile during the day.
·
Explore the likes of your partner that you don’t
particularly care for, have no interest
·
Develop a common interest/talent together
·
Do not keep secrets; open lines of communication
on all subjects
·
Time set aside to communicate with your spouse
(no TV, other distractions)
Spiritual
·
Couple prayers
·
Go to temple together
·
When praying, vocalize the things you love about
your spouse in your prayer
·
Share in the spiritual leadership of your home;
discuss spiritual issues beforehand as a partnership
·
If you don’t read scriptures together, then at least read
in the same place
I hope you will find some of these tips helpful to you. I know I got a few good ones out of our assignment. Now I am going to go reconnect with my hubby. :)
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
How do YOU keep the flame burning?
Jon and I have been asked to be part of panel in one of our church classes this Sunday. We have been asked to share some practical tips on how we can keep the love alive in a marriage through the years and kids and trials.
I know what we have done and some things we could and probably should do better. One of our main ones is to take alone trips every couple of years. We have done one between every birth of a child (except between Noble and Harrison.) I guess we are needing 2 now. :) These trips have really helped us reconnect on a Jon and Steph level and not a Mom and Dad level. I always remember who I am and why I like Jon so much on these trips.
Jon and I were wondering if any of you have found things that work for you. Anyone got some good tips we can share?
Also, Dance party at my house tonight at 8:30. Hope to see you there.
I know what we have done and some things we could and probably should do better. One of our main ones is to take alone trips every couple of years. We have done one between every birth of a child (except between Noble and Harrison.) I guess we are needing 2 now. :) These trips have really helped us reconnect on a Jon and Steph level and not a Mom and Dad level. I always remember who I am and why I like Jon so much on these trips.
Jon and I were wondering if any of you have found things that work for you. Anyone got some good tips we can share?
Also, Dance party at my house tonight at 8:30. Hope to see you there.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Bad Things Happen to Good People
I have been thinking about the suffering of good people lately. I think so often I fall into the karma trap of believing that if you are putting good out into the world good things should be coming to you. And while I guess this is true in an Eternal perspective, sometimes it just seems like life doesn't work that way. Bad things happen everyday to good people who don't "deserve" it.
They can be little injustices or huge losses. Either way these bad things can add up to be difficult to bear. And the kicker is that often they happen to people who are doing everything they can to do what is right and just and make the world a better place. They happen to people who "deserve" to win at the game of life. People who work hard and are generous to others and are kind.
But in my thinking on this subject, I have noticed how many times in the scriptures there are prophets who "deserve" to win and are subjected to pains and trials. They are imprisoned and cast out and rejected. I notice how often they pray for strength to bear their afflictions with patience and faith.
Reading these stories in the scriptures where we can find out how the story ended just a few verses further makes it almost seem that it was easy for these men or women. But I have thought more seriously about how it must really have been, in the moment, for these faithful servants of God.
How must Daniel have felt as he was thrown into the lions' den for being obedient to the Lord's commandment to pray? Did he ever doubt? Did he wonder if maybe the Lord just wanted him to die? Did he feel forsaken as he walked to that lions' den?
I guess the point that has hit me yet again in my reflections is that ultimately we "win" at this game of life if at the end we have become like our Savior Jesus Christ. And he was a man acquainted with grief, a man of sorrows, a man rejected by his own. He healed the sick and made the lame walk and the blind see and still he was falsely accused and put to death in a most cruel manner.
He allowed himself to suffer so that he would know how to succor us. Because He knew that in this mortal life, bad things would always happen to good people. And He knew that through those trials of our faith, we would find opportunities to grow in important ways and to become more like Him.
They can be little injustices or huge losses. Either way these bad things can add up to be difficult to bear. And the kicker is that often they happen to people who are doing everything they can to do what is right and just and make the world a better place. They happen to people who "deserve" to win at the game of life. People who work hard and are generous to others and are kind.
But in my thinking on this subject, I have noticed how many times in the scriptures there are prophets who "deserve" to win and are subjected to pains and trials. They are imprisoned and cast out and rejected. I notice how often they pray for strength to bear their afflictions with patience and faith.
Reading these stories in the scriptures where we can find out how the story ended just a few verses further makes it almost seem that it was easy for these men or women. But I have thought more seriously about how it must really have been, in the moment, for these faithful servants of God.
How must Daniel have felt as he was thrown into the lions' den for being obedient to the Lord's commandment to pray? Did he ever doubt? Did he wonder if maybe the Lord just wanted him to die? Did he feel forsaken as he walked to that lions' den?
I guess the point that has hit me yet again in my reflections is that ultimately we "win" at this game of life if at the end we have become like our Savior Jesus Christ. And he was a man acquainted with grief, a man of sorrows, a man rejected by his own. He healed the sick and made the lame walk and the blind see and still he was falsely accused and put to death in a most cruel manner.
He allowed himself to suffer so that he would know how to succor us. Because He knew that in this mortal life, bad things would always happen to good people. And He knew that through those trials of our faith, we would find opportunities to grow in important ways and to become more like Him.
Monday, July 16, 2012
My Famous Baby
For those of you who don't read the comments, a crazy thing happened when I was doing cousin's camp. Jon and the boys went to the aquatic center in Cedar City with my sister in laws and brothers and all the kids under age 5. While they were there a woman named Angie introduced herself to Jon as a reader of my blog.
I get that once every 6 months or so. Jon has had it happen a couple of times. But this woman, Angie, recognized Harrison. Actually, she saw Harrison and thought to herself, "that baby looks like Camille."
We think that often in our home. But to have someone who has never met us and never met Camille in person see it and recognize the resemblance between them without first knowing that Harrison is Camille's brother ... well it was a pretty awesome way to be recognized.
Jon, who was holding Harrison, then turned around and Angie recognized him as my husband and realized then why that baby looked so much like Camille.
Thanks for that Angie. It is a gift. Thank you for letting me know. I wish I had been there to meet you in person and give you a hug. Thanks to those who still read and support. I appreciate you more than my words can express.
I get that once every 6 months or so. Jon has had it happen a couple of times. But this woman, Angie, recognized Harrison. Actually, she saw Harrison and thought to herself, "that baby looks like Camille."
We think that often in our home. But to have someone who has never met us and never met Camille in person see it and recognize the resemblance between them without first knowing that Harrison is Camille's brother ... well it was a pretty awesome way to be recognized.
Jon, who was holding Harrison, then turned around and Angie recognized him as my husband and realized then why that baby looked so much like Camille.
Thanks for that Angie. It is a gift. Thank you for letting me know. I wish I had been there to meet you in person and give you a hug. Thanks to those who still read and support. I appreciate you more than my words can express.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Cousin's Camp
For the last 5 years, my parents have held a cousin's camp each summer. They invite all the 5 year olds and older to come to their cabin for a weekend and they plan a little camp with lots of activities that are all based around some spiritual theme. The kids LOVE it. It is a lot of work for my parents but they enjoy being able to share time with the kids and give them some lessons too.
At the beginning of each camp they sit in Cousin Camp Circle and welcome the new campers who have turned 5 in the last year. Then they introduce the theme for that year and begin their activities.
Well this year my parents are in Africa on a mission. But we didn't want the kids to miss out on cousin's camp. And this year the only new cousin that would have turned five was Camille. So I volunteered to run cousin's camp this year with a theme all based around angels.
After months of preparation, this weekend we had our Angels cousin camp. It was an incredibly special weekend for me. I felt angels with us at cousin's camp. I felt Camille there. I felt my grandparents there.
We had lots of fun doing activities like fishing on a boat at Panguich Lake and making marshmallow shooter guns and doing an obstacle course. We also had some really spiritual times when we heard about peoples experiences with angels.
I shared some experiences I have had when I have felt angels helping me. We also heard from our Aunt Nikki about some experiences she has had with angels. I had Sabrina read Nie Nies book Heaven Is Here and report on her experiences with angels helping her. And I also had Ann Marie read and report on The Message by Lance Richardson. I love that book.
We all learned more about my grandparents and Camille as we shared what we knew about them and our memories of them. I hope the kids came away feeling that angels are real and that when we need them most, they will be there helping us even if we can't see them.
I have shed a lot of tears this weekend. I shared so many personal things with these lovely little campers. And I reminded myself that in my needy times, angels will attend me. All I have to do is ask for help from my Father and He will send His Heavenly help. That is a reminder I needed.
At the beginning of each camp they sit in Cousin Camp Circle and welcome the new campers who have turned 5 in the last year. Then they introduce the theme for that year and begin their activities.
Well this year my parents are in Africa on a mission. But we didn't want the kids to miss out on cousin's camp. And this year the only new cousin that would have turned five was Camille. So I volunteered to run cousin's camp this year with a theme all based around angels.
After months of preparation, this weekend we had our Angels cousin camp. It was an incredibly special weekend for me. I felt angels with us at cousin's camp. I felt Camille there. I felt my grandparents there.
We had lots of fun doing activities like fishing on a boat at Panguich Lake and making marshmallow shooter guns and doing an obstacle course. We also had some really spiritual times when we heard about peoples experiences with angels.
I shared some experiences I have had when I have felt angels helping me. We also heard from our Aunt Nikki about some experiences she has had with angels. I had Sabrina read Nie Nies book Heaven Is Here and report on her experiences with angels helping her. And I also had Ann Marie read and report on The Message by Lance Richardson. I love that book.
We all learned more about my grandparents and Camille as we shared what we knew about them and our memories of them. I hope the kids came away feeling that angels are real and that when we need them most, they will be there helping us even if we can't see them.
I have shed a lot of tears this weekend. I shared so many personal things with these lovely little campers. And I reminded myself that in my needy times, angels will attend me. All I have to do is ask for help from my Father and He will send His Heavenly help. That is a reminder I needed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)