Sunday, January 3, 2010

Make Some Noise!

"Kids like to make noise." That is the thought that came into my mind as I listened to Lauren pounding on Jonathan's keyboard to hear each different sound it could make. Meanwhile in the adjacent bathroom Sabrina and Ann Marie are taking a bath and laughing and playing with each other ... loudly. Jonathan is laying on the floor at the foot of our bed and I am on our bed watching Lauren experimentally pound away.

Kids like to make noise and right in that moment there was quite a bit of noise - even with Noble sleeping. I imagined how loud it would be if he were awake and either crying or "talking." I don't always do well with a lot of noise. Sometimes I think it is going to drive me crazy.

Then I thought about the days before Jonathan and I had children. I imagined us there with no children. Just the two of us laying on the bed and the floor. "How boring," I thought. I am amazed that together Jon and I have built up this little noise making crew. And then I felt grateful for the noise. It fills my life. Even the crying. Sometimes when Noble is crying and I feel I am going to go crazy I remind myself how desperately I wanted to hear Camille cry in the hospital. Then I am thankful for the crying.

Today I welcome the noise. The pounding, the playing, the laughter, and the tears. It is the soundtrack to a mother's life. I will have plenty of quiet years in the future. But for now I am enjoying the life represented by the noise.