Wednesday, March 13, 2013

How Times Have Changed

I am getting a small preview of the coming months. Jon has been in NYC for a couple of days for a conference for his new job. He gets back late tonight. Nine days later we move him out to Dallas. Then I will only get to see him once or twice a month until we move out there to join him sometime this summer.

Jon and I were on opposite coasts for our whole engagement and dating experience. It was rough. But that was almost 14 years ago. In our modern age of technology, a lot changes in 14 years. I didn't even have a cell phone back then. Imagine that!

The last couple days are certainly more work and less sleep for me. But, Instagram, texting and other new technologies are going to make this long distance thing a little better this time around.

I have had fun seeing Jon's Instagrams to see what he is doing and the joy in his day. I have been putting up some photos for him of his little buddies. It makes us feel more connected even when we are 3000 miles apart and he is in meetings all day and can't talk.

Perhaps one of the hardest parts that I hadn't really considered before will be how much the kids will miss Jonathan. Harrison can't say too many words, but he can say "Dad." He has been clingy with me today and every time we pass the office or my bedroom or Jon's car, or a family picture he points and says, "Dad." He misses his Dad.

By the time we finally move to Dallas, Harrison will be thinking Dad is in the computer. Because he will see him on Skype more than in person. But at least he will be able to see him and talk to him. I am so grateful for our modern technology for these good things it enables. It has serious "side effects" and dangers, but it can also bring great blessings to us.


Anonymous said...

My husband was gone for 17mos when he was in school and deployed (only 3 days in-between the two). I only had two kids at the time but we've also had months apart as we've added more kiddos to the mix. The number one thing I could suggest is making sure there are pictures of Daddy all over...even making Harrison a little 4x6 album (using those cheapo albums they sell at the Dollar Store) of fun times with Daddy if you can. Skype is, of course, a huge blessing. I don't think a Daddy Doll is necessary for a few months...but there is always that option(if interested, Google search and it should be one of the first to come girls slept with theirs every night). Talking about Daddy helps my kiddos. Having a regular time for him to call or Skype so you can do family home evening/family prayer/scripture study/etc. I've also had friends with toddlers who would get one of those books where you can record Daddy reading it (or just record onto a CD and use a little bell when they need to turn the page) and that way they can hear Daddy whenever they want. A special treat/meal/etc you do once a week gives them something to look forward to.

It's hard for little one's. It's hard for big one's. It's really just hard for everyone (especially Mama) when Daddy has to be away. Lots of extra snuggles and love even when they act like they don't need it. I hope this time passes quickly...but that it is always filled with many amazing moments for everyone. Hugs to all of you.

Anonymous said...

Ugh...always = also. Sorry. :)

Anonymous said...

Best Wishes with all of this . . .

Brittany said...

When my husband was deployed Skype was a lifesaver! Plus I recorded him talking to my daughter and reading her bedtime stories on the video camera. She loved watching the "daddy show" every day (: good luck. That is so hard on everyone.

Anonymous said...

You're a pretty nice wife to continually go along with your husbands latest fly by night ideas. I read your blog and I wonder to myself does he even consider you and the kids and how all of you feel when he is searching for his happiness? He sounds pretty selfish to me and I hope he really appreciates you and all that you do to allow him to follow his dreams.

Stephanie said...

Dear Anon,

Let me apologize if I gave you the wrong impression about my husband. I can assure you that he is anything but selfish. He is not "following his dreams" by taking this job. He is following OUR dream and I would venture to say him taking this job is more about pleasing me than himself.

Jon's pursuing a career in the world of investments has always been our long term plan. We hoped we could make a go of it here in Vegas. I wanted to be by family. That is the major reason we came here. Then Camille died and we had more reason to stay here.

But there just aren't opportunities for Jon to work in investments in Vegas. It was ME that told him he needed to look outside of Vegas to find a job that would continue our long term goals. He didn't want to, but he started looking world wide because he loves me.

I am thrilled that of all the places we could move, we get Dallas. While I don't want to move, I want more to have my husband continue to be the provider for our family and long term, this is the way that we will be able to make that happen.

Trust me when I say that Jonathan appreciates me and sacrifices his own happiness for me and my children in both small and large ways daily.

This is just a case in point of being careful when judging others. You just never know what is going on behind the scenes and that is especially true in the blogosphere.

Brittany said...

I don't know you personally, Stephanie, but I have been reading your blog for awhile and I don't think anything you have ever posted as ever sounded like either you or your husband are selfish. Personally I think both of you sound super selfless and so much in love that you both want what is best for you family. I, also, think you are both amazing parents and it sounds like your children are amazing because of both you and your husbands examples.

Anonymous said...

Shame on you for following your husband and his half-brained schemes across the country. You should be following YOUR dreams!

He's only weighing you down! You are so talented, beautiful and wise. Leave him for greener pastures!! In fact, the best idea is to come join us -- your true loves!!

Jacob the werewolf
Dark Chocolate
Zac Efron
oh, and Will Smith

Anonymous said...

I am not the ANGRY anonymous . . .

You go, girl!