I had my last OB appointment today. I am feeling pretty crampy now. The doctor is ripening my cervix using the balloon method. My mom has come over to save the day and "be me" today. She is doing my errands and packing my hospital bag and taking care of my kiddos for me. Mom's are the greatest, especially mine.
I am sitting on the recliner trying to count contractions. I am not very good at that. I have a hard time distinguishing contraction pain from my general tightness and the baby moving and just my overall hurting. But one way or another I am very excited that I will no longer be pregnant in the next 24 to 36 hours.
Last night I had an awful night. I couldn't fall asleep. I just had this foreboding feeling and tons of anxiety. I get that every now and then since Camille's accident. I laid in bed with "worst case scenarios" playing over and over in my head till midnight when I finally got up and went downstairs to watch some TV. That seemed to settle my brain and I was able to fall asleep around 2 a.m.
I am not sure if the hospital I am going to this time has internet access in the delivery rooms like the one I had Noble did. If it does, I will blog from the hospital and let you all know how things go. If not you will have to wait till Saturday or Sunday.
This has been a big month in my family. An emotional one. I have other things to post about. Like the fact that my parents have just sold their home, my childhood home, the place I grew up, the home Jonathan and I lived in when we moved to Las Vegas from California, Camille's first home. It is an emotional thing. One I have cried a good deal of tears over and try not to think about too much. But I have a post in me on it. I will write it a bit later as they get closer to actually moving. They have to be out by May 15th but could move as soon as mid April depending on when they settle on the house they want to buy.
Change. It is inevitable, necessary, often painful, and hard to swallow. But it is part of life. And in the end, every change moves us forward and molds us a bit more into who we will eventually become.