tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post2924905782638563028..comments2024-02-10T10:20:14.121-08:00Comments on A Daily Scoop: How to Treat a Friend Who Has Suffered a Loss -- Part 1Stephanie Waitehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08952237536421682841noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-76766206516427656112008-07-30T17:34:00.000-07:002008-07-30T17:34:00.000-07:00I too am a planner. I love how your mom put it--"...I too am a planner. I love how your mom put it--"I like to measure my life out in teaspoons." There are a few distinct times in my life when the Lord's plan was definitely NOT my plan, and yet those paths are the source of my greatest blessings. In hindsight I am able to look at the Lord's wisdom with awe and gratitude. You seem to have the gratitude much sooner than I; I need to work on that. I am anxious to hear your words of wisdom on "how to treat a friend who has suffered a loss."Stephaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14500181507537002516noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-29478690759161044572008-07-25T13:24:00.000-07:002008-07-25T13:24:00.000-07:00Thank you for sharing,your strength gives me comfo...Thank you for sharing,your strength gives me comfort. I feel as though you have wrote out the situation in our lives that we had to endure with the miscarriages. I get strength from reading your post. We also had two miscarriages. Then today my son almost drowned in the pool. It is so hard for me not to blame myself. I love to read your words. They give me so much peace and stregth. Thank you for sharing your spirit. I feel blessed to have read your words.Build It,Sew It,Love Ithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935759472810949521noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-46268727841306911702008-07-25T07:58:00.000-07:002008-07-25T07:58:00.000-07:00I had a m/c between baby #1 and baby #2 @ 6 weeks....I had a m/c between baby #1 and baby #2 @ 6 weeks. The doctor who I went to see basically told me that they were not going to consider it a m/c because THEY had never confirmed the pregnancy. I was stunned -- I knew that the life I had been carrying no longer existed but for them to not even acknowledge that it was there in the first place? I'm still angry now, 1 1/2 years later.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-81178357995446676082008-07-24T14:26:00.000-07:002008-07-24T14:26:00.000-07:00Stephanie,I'm a few days behind in reading your po...Stephanie,<BR/>I'm a few days behind in reading your post, but still I wanted to thank you for sharing the things you share. Loss, in any degree, is difficult. It is so interesting to me how each of us handle it (even the same type, such as a miscarriage) differently--and like you said--every day can bring a new condition or emotion.<BR/>{{{Hugs}}}<BR/>CharlotteCharhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14130111502524635305noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-45331872927951208492008-07-23T19:48:00.000-07:002008-07-23T19:48:00.000-07:00Thank you for sharing your experience. I just had...Thank you for sharing your experience. I just had a miscarriage that happened to be a lot like your first, and am so grateful for all the things that family and friends did to help us get through it. I too had a spiritual experience that has helped me get through it, but also appreciate the knowledge that I am not the only one that has gone through this.Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13714767818788494872noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-59876338980169120792008-07-23T15:04:00.000-07:002008-07-23T15:04:00.000-07:00Stephanie, I have learned so much from you. Than...Stephanie,<BR/> I have learned so much from you. Thanks so much for sharing. I had two miscarriages as well. They were both devastating. I can't imagine all that you have gone through loosing Camille. My prayers are with you. Thanks for your example. <BR/>-Tara LemosTara L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/09762740339770231745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-34191089717060018692008-07-23T14:44:00.000-07:002008-07-23T14:44:00.000-07:00Stephanie:Can't wait to read more tomorrow. I wou...Stephanie:<BR/>Can't wait to read more tomorrow. I would love to hear more about your mother. She looks like an angel, and in every picture has such a look of peace. I would love to be the kind of mother she must have be to have a daughter like you. You are such an inspiration. LoriAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-76258396464487752402008-07-23T12:58:00.000-07:002008-07-23T12:58:00.000-07:00stephanie--thanks for sharing those experiences wi...stephanie--<BR/><BR/>thanks for sharing those experiences with us. it seemed to be evidence to me that the lord truly prepares us for the things we'll have to endure. not that those miscarriages come anywhere near to the loss you're dealing with now, but it seems that they taught you huge lessons about recieving comfort from the lord, angels, family, etc. i remember hearing you tell me about the second miscarriage when i was staying with you in vegas a couple of years ago, and i was so impressed with your ability to be so in tune with the spirit to recieve the guidance you needed so easily. you inspired me then as you continue to do now.<BR/><BR/>an interesting note on "how to treat a friend who has suffered a loss." as i told you before, i'm a doer. i couldn't just sit idly by at learn of your grief and sorrow. i had to do 'something.' as i also told you doing the small things i have done were just as therapeutic for me as for you. one thing i decided to do was to comment very regularly on your blog. i knew that you were drawing comfort from that, and it was something i could do. there have been many times when i've read a post, and not really known where to start or what to say, but as i clicked on "post a comment" something seemed to come out. i cannot imagine what you're going through, i can only share my thoughts and feelings on what you talk about going through. i hope and pray that the things i have said have helped. <BR/><BR/>you seem to be much more happy and upbeat since r & e have arrived. i love that. i love you. i love your whole harris family.<BR/><BR/>maryclaire<BR/><BR/>ps. this may be mean, but i really hope comfort is gone this week, and i'm secretly falling in love with twitch. ssshhh...don't tell brian.MaryClaire Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16565067462212408638noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-24874024467098876272008-07-23T12:25:00.000-07:002008-07-23T12:25:00.000-07:00I had a complication with a pregnancy and did not ...I had a complication with a pregnancy and did not have a child.<BR/>I have other children. When I first suspected that there might be a problem, I was told through a personal prompting that I would not have the baby. I was grateful for that. I think we can plan and set goals and we are to utilize our agency. However what is most important is when we learn to accept that the Lord may also have a plan for us, and that we are not in charge all the time. That is what is humbling. Allowing ourselves to use our agency to submit to the Lord's will. And at times our trials are our blessings. I think that some times we have to choose to be at peace by partaking of the atonement and allowing ourselves to be healed and shaped into our very best self by Heavenly Father.<BR/>If we want to know how to treat anyone, in any joyful or difficult situation we should be striving to become like the Savior. We should be making his example a daily exercise in our lives. We all have opinions about how things should be done, but if we are following the example of our savior in the giving and recieving of service and comfort, then it would be difficult for things to not be given and recieved in the right spirit. The Savior is our perfect example and when we follow this example of love, service,and forgiveness then we see the world and its many experiences through new eyes, and better hearts. I know that Heavenly Father and Jesus loves each of us, and if we turn to them in sincere prayer we will be given the insight and inspiration in how to "bear one anothers burdens". If we invite the Lord into our lives by being obedient and following the example of the Savior I feel that each person will be able to fulfill one of my favorite quotes:<BR/>If you could see the person <BR/>God intends you to be<BR/>you would rise up <BR/>and never be the same.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-87430522592770525022008-07-23T12:13:00.000-07:002008-07-23T12:13:00.000-07:00I'm sure I am one of the many that have been readi...I'm sure I am one of the many that have been reading your posts daily but haven't commented. I am awestruck by your strength and your testimony. Our lesson in RS on Sunday was from the JS manual about death. it was a truly wonderful lesson. A lady made a comment that so each death is a unique experience to everyone who loved that person. Your blog crossed my mind at many points during the lesson and it made me thankful for people who are willing to share their testimonies, their pain and their happy moments. It's ok if there are people that want deal with the loss in private. Interesting how all humans are the same but yet so different and complex in their own personal way.<BR/>We tried for 6 years to have a baby and never made it happen on our own. I found out that the Lord had his own plan in mind. We received a phone call out of the blue from a girl we knew who had an unwanted pregnancy and she immediately thought of us. We feel like chosen parents and our little girl will be two years old next month. Being a mother is such a humbling and amazing experience and one I didn't think I would ge to have. I feel blessed and lucky to have that opportunity hre on earth. Thank you for teaching me to appreciate all times i have wanted tear my hair out. You are making a difference in peoples lives even though a tragedy has occurred in your life. That is so powerful! God bless you and your family!<BR/>Danielle Pies<BR/>azpies@gmail.com<BR/>Gilbert, AZDPieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16114521556496334240noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-28182816965803355572008-07-23T12:07:00.000-07:002008-07-23T12:07:00.000-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Lindsayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01551647942730841309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-50295087199860428172008-07-23T11:44:00.000-07:002008-07-23T11:44:00.000-07:00Your first miscarriage sounds a lot like my own. ...Your first miscarriage sounds a lot like my own. However, I didn't know for sure I was miscarrying until I went to the doctor and he told me there was nothing in the sac. I was devastated, but also though the Spirit was able to heal. You are amazing to have lost now three children (as I see my miscarriage as a child, although unborn). Your story has touched me and makes me more appreciative of my own little one.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-39014691823827679852008-07-23T08:24:00.000-07:002008-07-23T08:24:00.000-07:00I too, have had two miscarriages. They were both ...I too, have had two miscarriages. They were both right in a row and I can't even explain how traumatic that was for me. I was so angry with myself, my body, the Lord. I was just so down. I'm not sure how many prayers my husband had to give me but in the end and looking back it definitely made me grow spiritually.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-3735491438528723022008-07-23T08:19:00.000-07:002008-07-23T08:19:00.000-07:00Stephanie,A friend of mine told me about your blog...Stephanie,<BR/>A friend of mine told me about your blog and so I have spent the morning reading. You are a strong woman. I also have four kids, my baby boy is 16 months old. I too felt like three was "easy", now four is overwhelming but I will give my baby a big hug today and be grateful. God Bless you every day. You do have an angel waiting for you.<BR/>Amyjoy Price<BR/>Boise, IDTodd and Amyjoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03077415312535999788noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-13970666699116115382008-07-23T08:17:00.000-07:002008-07-23T08:17:00.000-07:00Hi-I am one of the many who have admired your blog...Hi-<BR/>I am one of the many who have admired your blog from afar. Your words are so inspiring and I have recommended reading them to many. This post especially touched me. I have lost 5 babies (waiting 'till after the 1st tri-mester to tell people doesn't work for me). As I have read your writings, I have used your inspiration to help me deal with the pain that still lingers. Though, I'm sure it doesn't compare to loosing a child you knew and cuddled in your arms. Thank you for sharing your life and inspiration with so many. I've always said that when you loose a baby, you join an exclusive club that really nobody wants to join, they are forced to. The 'outsiders' have no idea how to deal with these club members and maybe some guidelines will help them to see that we are not 'different', just people, with feelings, just like them.{sara}https://www.blogger.com/profile/17279474124770721941noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-47343075689817988622008-07-23T07:51:00.000-07:002008-07-23T07:51:00.000-07:00Thank you so much for sharing yet another so priva...Thank you so much for sharing yet another so private part of your life with us. I hope you know how many lives you are touching by saying things that all of us wonder but are too afraid to ask. You are such an example to me! Big hugs to you!!Heather Hhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07282617277688280815noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-49158573070423799052008-07-23T07:46:00.000-07:002008-07-23T07:46:00.000-07:00Stephanie-I think you are right. We often don't k...Stephanie-<BR/><BR/>I think you are right. We often don't know exactly what to say because all trials are different. That being said, I think Heavenly Father gives us trials for many reasons and I think one of those is to help others. It is so hard to face hardship; but, one thing I know is that somewhere, sometime in our lives that hardship is going to help us in furthering God's work and reaching out and helping someone else in need. You have helped so many and touched so many lives.Debhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13828771314299049409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-14789904076174899722008-07-23T07:16:00.000-07:002008-07-23T07:16:00.000-07:00Stephanie,I just want to thank you for the daily s...Stephanie,<BR/>I just want to thank you for the daily strength that you send out on you blog every day. About 6 weeks ago we lost out baby, I was 17 weeks pregnant. At 18 weeks I went in to deliver, but my body didn’t want to let go of the baby I guess, so they ended up doing a D&C. For 5 weeks now I thought that we were able to move on, but Monday night I delivered our little boy at home. They had completely missed him. He was fully in tacked and perfect with all his fingers, toes and his daddy’s thin lips. This is hard to have to go though a second time after already morning the loss of our child, but I find strength through you blog. Thank you, Thank you so much for being strong for me and so many others and helping me get through this. Your faith strengthens my testimony in the gospel and makes my grateful for the church. So thank you, you’re a great example to me.<BR/>MissyWashington Washburnshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02298133482818728945noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-60320658325113560802008-07-23T07:13:00.000-07:002008-07-23T07:13:00.000-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Washington Washburnshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02298133482818728945noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-92016147265399472272008-07-23T04:34:00.000-07:002008-07-23T04:34:00.000-07:00I'm glad you remembered God's love during those ch...I'm glad you remembered God's love during those challenging times. He will never let us down. God bless!<BR/><BR/>LaurieLaurie Kolphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07494759781947881343noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-47345168451180594242008-07-23T03:05:00.000-07:002008-07-23T03:05:00.000-07:00Looking forward to your post too!!!Looking forward to your post too!!!Verahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04858522376878407010noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7260216734032540750.post-84943557480177001012008-07-23T01:48:00.000-07:002008-07-23T01:48:00.000-07:00Stephanie, You are amazing. I look forward to you...Stephanie, <BR/><BR/>You are amazing. I look forward to your post tomorrow/today. yes. it is a sleepless night for me. Thanks for your friendship to Brittany. <BR/><BR/>Love MargaretMargarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12967455078689855531noreply@blogger.com